Stop Dating And Have Fun
For many men, dating can be a minefield of insecurity, fear and hard work. A common mistake a lot of guys make is to pretend to be someone else in front of a girl, just to impress her, but this is where all the problems start. If you're not being yourself straight away, then how long will it be before she sees through the facade and feels cheated?
Contrary to what you might think, not all women are after a six-foot, rippling bicep Hollywood hunk, they just want someone genuine, who's comfortable with himself. Women place a lot of importance on trust, so regardless of what you look like, as long as you're honest with her then you've got a great chance of making your relationship a success.
But if dating still fills you with dread, maybe it's time to change the way you approach it. Removing the pressure of dating means you're more likely to meet someone 'naturally,' because it won't look like you're even looking. So how do you do this?
Know your dating style
Are you dating just to find some casual fun, to find new female friends to hang out with or maybe hook up with once in a while, or are you dating because you're serious about finding “the one”? Being honest about why you're dating, will help you meet someone who's after the same thing. Think about it.
What's the point in going out with a girl who you know is after a husband, if you're only after a casual fling? That's not to say a friendship can't develop into something more serious later down the line, but at the dating stage, you both need to be upfront about what you're hoping to get from the date.
Re-evaluate your attitude
Dating often gets a bad press. It's seen as a chore, a hindrance, but something we “have to do” if we want to build a relationship. But that's approaching dating in completely the wrong way. It's a bad attitude and you need to get rid of it.
Instead of thinking “Oh I really don’t want to go on this date but I’ll go ahead because I have to...,” try thinking positively instead. “I'm going to go on this date with an open mind, just be myself, have some fun and see what happens.” This way, you're allowing yourself and your date to just happen naturally. There's nothing worse than arriving for a date and immediately sensing that the other person doesn't want to be there.
So check your attitude when going out on dates. Yes, you've spent a lot of time and effort (hopefully!) getting ready for your date, to look your best and make a good first impression. So when your date decides to go home after just a few drinks, that can really sting. But seriously, who cares if they leave? It just wasn't meant to be that time. Don’t let a bad date ruin your future dates.
Go with the flow
Some guys like routines, schedules and habits, but that's often just an excuse not to try anything new. When you're looking for a date, you probably frequent the same bars and clubs, the places you feel comfortable, but that means that it's always the same kind of women you end up meeting. You need to learn to be spontaneous and just go with the flow.
Try new restaurants, different clubs or just try taking yourself out and seeing where the evening takes you. Planning ahead is all well and good – in business, with family etc. – but when it comes to finding potential dates, you need to just let your instincts take over once in a while and see where they lead you. The point is, if you are having fun, then women are going to notice that and wonder what it is that's putting a smile on your face.
Be open to new ideas
Exploring your own limitations can be a huge confidence boost which, in turn, makes you more attractive to women. Step outside your comfort zone and take up a new hobby like learning a language, taking salsa lessons (what woman doesn’t love a man that can dance!) or do a cookery course – anything you thought you'd never do. You might not like everything you try, but chances are you'll stumble across something which ignites something in you and can open your eyes not just to how many different things there are to enjoy in life, but how many different types of women there are, too, just waiting to meet a guy like you.